Monday, March 16, 2009

What should I do? Some advice to clients and lawyers

Whenever someone is contemplating divorce, I remind them that they have three choices.

1. Get divorced;
2. Go to counselling;
3. Do nothing.

Expierence has taught me that all three decisions are good decisions even in lousy relationships. When struggling with a relationship, you should consider every choice. You should rely on a matirmonial attorney for the first choice and your friends/therapist for the remaining choices.

As a matrimonial attorney I know my limits. I am not a therapist. I take pride in separating my feelings from the case. I always advise a client on what I think they should do while never being afraid to do what my clients ask me to do.

Too often lawyers cannot separate their feelings with their client's. These lawyers try to act as attorneys and therapists. The attorney typically has an emotional attachment to their client's cause.

My advice, if you are an attorney don't be your client's therapist. If you are a client, stay away from an attorney that gives you emotional advice.

While a good friend or therapist is important while struggling with your marriage, your attorney should never be your thearpist. Doing so will typically work to your detriment and increase the cost of the case substantially.


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